Family Matters

Family matters and I am not talking about the show.  We all know that with a family comes drama, fights, disagreements and conflict, but in the end most of us know that no matter what, family comes first.  When you think of family, they are the individuals that hold us together.  They are the glue to our very existence.  When we need them they are the first ones there by our side, through the good, bad and ugly.

I can’t even envision what I would be, without the values that make me through my parents.  Of course we are all different, but with diversity comes culture, comes variety.  We all can gain positive reinforcement and are provided with structure and guidance through our family.

What would we ever do without family?  I personally know that through thick and thin, whether being miles apart I would always have my family by my side. 

What is the definition of family; –noun 1. parents and their children, considered as a group, whether dwelling together or not.  2.  the children of one person or one couple collectively: We want a large family.  3.  the spouse and children of one person: We’re taking the family on vacation next week.  4.  any group of persons closely related by blood, as parents, children, uncles, aunts, and cousins: to marry into a socially prominent family.  5.  all those persons considered as descendants of a common progenitor.  6.   Chiefly British. approved lineage, esp. noble, titled, famous, or wealthy ancestry: young men of family.    7.   a group of persons who form a household under one head, including parents, children, and servants.   8.   the staff, or body of assistants, of an official: the office family.   9.   a group of related things or people: the family of romantic poets; the halogen family of elements.   10.   a group of people who are generally not blood relations but who share common attitudes, interests, or goals and, frequently, live together: Many hippie communes of the sixties regarded themselves as families.   –adjective  11.   of, pertaining to, or characteristic of a family: a family trait.   12.   belonging to or used by a family: a family automobile; a family room.   13.   suitable or appropriate for adults and children: a family amusement park.   

When reading that it sees pretty black and white, cold almost, but with family comes love. And that is the basis, in which we see family.  We don’t look at the word family and think black and white, we see the bigger picture. The categories that make us what we are. The nurturing, the compassion, the love, the respect.  With those, the making of a family is easy.

I come from a different breed than my husband.  He indeed is a wonderful father, but I definitely believe that he learned what love was through his path of life.  Through the women that he has been in relationships with, through his children.  I do not believe that he learned love through his family.  He may disagree with me on this issue, but from what I see he and I were raised with different principles.

Family for me represents our strengths, they teach us wisdom, they give us values, family as a whole are seen as love. 

What is the definition of love then;  –noun 1.   a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.   2.  a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.   3.  sexual passion or desire.  4.   a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.   5.   (used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love?   6.   a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour.   7.   sexual intercourse; copulation.   8.   (initial capital letter) a personification of sexual affection, as Eros or Cupid.  9.   affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one’s neighbor.  10.  strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: her love of books.  11.   the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love.   12.   the benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God.

When reading that I see my family, but I absolutely do not see my husband’s family.  It is really sad, that my husband hasn’t had the same kind of up-bringing as me.  I have had the fortune of having a wonderful set of parents, and through all of life’s rides, great siblings. 

My in-laws have somewhere down their path of life, miscommunicated love.  They have forgotten that family comes first. They have forgotten that their children and grandchildren are people.  Human beings.  They have forgotten that people have feeling; they have forgotten that their children, that they have brought into the world, are still and always will be their children.  Young or old, their children need love, affection and encouragement.  My husband definitely didn’t receive any positive enforcement from his family.  I find that this is so sad.

We all need to be loved, we all need to be respected.  So next time you think that you don’t have time, and things are an inconvienence, remember you to may need something in return.  Help is a two way street, and family should always be there!!  No matter what!

 

Lynn

Makes Me Smile

Every now and then I get a forward that just makes me smile inside!!  So I received this one to my hotmail account and I enjoyed it so much, I wanted to share it with you.  Who comes up with this stuff?   A mother is  driving her little girl to her friend’s house for a play  date. ‘ Mommy ,’ the little girl asks, ‘how old are  you?’ ‘Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age,’  the mother replied. ‘It’s not polite.’ ‘OK’, the  little girl says,  ’How much do  you weigh?’ ‘Now really,’ the mother  says,  ’those are  personal questions and are really none of your  business.’ Undaunted, the little girl asks, ‘Why did you and  Daddy get a divorce?’ ‘That’s enough questions, young lady!  Honestly!’ The exasperated mother walks away as the two  friends begin to play. ‘ My Mom won’t tell me anything about  her,’ the little girl says to her friend. ‘Well,’ says the  friend,  ’all you need  to do is look at her driver’s  license.  It’s like a  report card, it has everything on it.’ Later that night the  little girl says to her mother,  ’I know how old  you are. You are 32.’ The mother is surprised and  asks,  ’How did you  find that out? ‘I also know that you weigh 130  pounds.’ The mother is past surprised and shocked  now. ‘How in Heaven’s name did you find that  out?’ ‘And,’ the little girl says  triumphantly,  ’I know why you  and daddy got a divorce..’ ‘Oh  really?’ the mother asks. ‘Why?’ ‘Because  you got an F in sex.’     Cute eh?  If you have a cute joke or forward that you have always hung on to, send it to me, I’m sure that everyone would love to read it.   Lynn

Sex, When Is It Too Soon?

Let’s talk about sex!!  Tell me, when is it too soon to have sex?  I have friends from all different age ranges, and it is compelling to hear some of the conversations that they have, in discussing when it is too soon to have a sexual relationship, with the person that they are seeing.  So, when actually is it to soon to have sex?

I find that some women are very needy and for whatever reason they don’t have much self-respect.  They seem to think that a man is what makes them significant.  Well excuse me, I thought that we were living in a generation where we could do whatever we wanted.  Aren’t we  supposed to have this ideology that because it’s the 2000’s we can be a mother, a career woman and still juggle being a daughter, friend and confidont, without a man?

I hear young woman say in regards to their new relationships, well I am not having sex until we have been together for a month, or two months, or three months, what is that?  When has it become such a scheduled event?

A friend of mine is seeing this new fellow and managed to have the “serious talk”, with him, with demands such as, I am not having sex with you until we have been together for three months and that he has to take a STD (sexually transmitted disease) test.  Well, I completely agree that anyone that has had multiple partners, MUST, I repeat MUST take an STD test, both people.  I mean if she can wait a whole 3 months before giving herself to this man, that, let me remind you, she has only known for three months, then I believe that it probably hasn’t been her first time engaging in sexual activity in such a short span.

I have been brought up with very strong religious opinions and beliefs, but what I want to know is what year did sex before marriage become so conventional?  When did our society disregard humility?  When did our men and women lose dignity?  How and when did we become so numb to morals?  I deem that numbers do matter, and once you end up with the one that you have fallen madly in love with, the one you are meant to be with, you will wish that you were their one and only.  You will then wish that you could have been the one to explore and have sexual discovery with your partner.

Then there are people from the generations of the 40’s, 50’s and 60’s that seem to believe that they can go for the plunge because they are older and wiser.  That they know what love is or that because they have life experiences that somehow they aren’t capable of getting hurt or used.  They believe that younger people don’t have the mature capability to love or be loved.   That is nothing but a false perception.

Well, I am sorry but there is nothing that makes me believe that one group is any better than another.  Sex, is sex, regardless of the emotional connection or philosophy.

So many people say that you have to “dip your feet in the water”, or “you have to taste all the flavours to know which kind you want”, well these “flavours”,  are allowing women to have multiple children with different men. 

I mean, men and women use to wear chastity belts, and what, now that it is off, it’s a free for all.  Come on, give me a break, have some will-power, some self-restraint.  What’s wrong with waiting awhile?  Who unlocked the chastity belt?  Why are we sexually engaging in one night stands?  Why are we allowing ourselve to be a number on someone’s bedpost?

People cheat because they are missing something from their relationship, and well if you hadn’t have explored with everyone else, then perhaps your relationship wouldn’t have been so tedious and/or exasperating.  Think about it, how and when did we become so numb to morals?  Tell me, when is it too soon to have sex?

Lynn

Grooming……I’m Not Talking About Our Animals

Recently I haven’t been feeling very well, a have a rare form of arthritis in my back called Ankylosing Spondylitis which only 8% of people get.  I was in such excruciating pain and after two weeks of being bed ridden, I decided that through all the cases of H1N1 that I would probably be best suited  at the hospital, because getting rid of my pain was my number one priority. 

So through all my aches and pains I managed to get my behind in the car and to town my husband and I went.  Reaching the hospital we went in, checked in with the nurse, they sent me to do the almighty pee test, and then back to the waiting room I went.  There were so many sick people.  But through it all there was this show on the televisions called, Man Vs. Wild, or something like that.  It was such a gross show that it gave you no other choice but to forget that there was something wrong with us.  This fellow was drinking his own urine, and went in a dead camel to stay warm, everyone was laughing, it was so gross.

As my name got called we went to the room designated for us.  I was given a gown and told to strip to my skivies.  So the doctor came in and he was HOT, no really, a HOT doctor.  Instantly, I thought to myself, oh no, I haven’t shaved in a dog’s age.  So he came over and said that he had to do a test on my legs, well, let me tell you, a panick went though my body, immediately, I became red and began to express in pretty simple terms that summer was over.  Meaning, that’s right, its November, I haven’t shaved my legs since August. A cave woman, a real live cave woman.  I am warm, what can I say.

My husband was so embarrassed, but not for me, for himself, and only because the hair on my legs are longer then his. 

The doctor didn’t even smile, a little over professional as far as I’m concerned.  So he took the stick and checked for circulation, so  and so forth.  I can’t even tell you how humiliated I was.

So just to teach myself or anyone else out there, make sure you shave before going to the hospital, because you never know who will be touching you and when.  Thank goodness he didn’t need to check my armpits!!  lol

Do you have a shameful story or experience that you can share?  I’d love to hear it!!

Lynn

How To Treat A High Fever In A Child (H1N1) Style

I am writing this post because I want to share how to treat a high fever for a child that is sick or has H1N1 and yet so unmotivated to write anything right now. 

Recently our laptop crashed and I have been waiting for that to get fixed, as the weeks go by, so does my enthusiasm.  I really enjoy just laying on the couch, with my feet up, Pepsi in hand, ready to write.  It seems to me that at the time I have lots to say, but not so much when I have to sit at the computer desk and focus!!  That is my daughters favorite thing to say, “focus daddy, I need you to listen to me.”  “What you’re doing isn’t as important as what I have to say to you.”  Father, “what do you need to say to me?”  Daughter, “well nothing really, I just want you to listen to me.”  Cracks me up every time.  A little woman in the making.

So the biggest thing in our house is my husbands fear that we will get the H1N1 virus.  That is all and well, but it has gotten a little over board.  We aren’t around anyone and yet, sterilize your hands, sterilize your hands. 

Purell and I have become secret lovers!!  I’m pretty sure that people wonder if I have become a secret alcoholic…..with hand sanitizer!!  What’s that smell on you Lynn, let me smell your breath.   No joke, it’s really bad!  He has become OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder), I wish he felt this passionate about cleaning.  Mess is bad, mess is bad.  Would that make me wake up with a smile everyday!  And if it was his new found passion then I would sanitize as much as he wanted!!

So in our province the swine flu also know as H1N1 has been a prevalent virus in and around our community.  I am so happy that my daughter is not in school yet.  We all know that children are a factor in the spread of germs, and for the most part, the number one carrier in the spread of sickness. You can’t help but want to give your child extra love and affection when they are sick.  But children can be dirty little critters.  They put everything in their mouth, and touch everything!!  It’s not their fault though, they are just curious.  So when this outbreak began, we were even more aware of what our daughter was doing with her hands and where they were going.

When people speak of the H1N1 they talk about how intense the fever is.  I have been told that it is very hard to control and/or break.  So I asked my doctor and I thought that I would post what she said and if you are having a hard time with your method maybe you can take a couple of pointers from here.

1) Remove any excess clothing or blankets from the child.   They should wear one layer of thin clothing, and use a single blanket for sleeping.

2) Place the child in a cool room.  Turn up the air conditioning if possible or turn a fan on the child.

3) Administer either acetaminophen (Tylenol) or ibuprofen (Children’s Advil), for fever in children old enough to take this medication.  Acetaminophen is not recommended for children under three months, and ibuprofen is not recommended for children under six months.

4) Bath the child in a lukewarm bath.  Avoid bath water that is too cold, or alcohol rubs, as they will cause the child to shiver.  This will raise the child’s core body temperature, adding to the problem. 

5) Be aware that fevers are the result of both minor illnesses and serious infections.  Because it can often be hard to distinguish between the two, children with fevers should be brought to their pediatrician/doctor to be examined in many cases. Children less than three months old with a fever greater than 100.4 degrees, and children of any age with a fever greater than 105 degrees, should be seen by a doctor.

6 ) You also need  to keep your child from becoming dehydrated.  We lose extra water from the skin and lungs during a fever.

7) Encourage the child to drink clear fluids such as non-carbonated drinks without caffeine or juice (not water). Water does not contain the necessary electrolytes and glucose.  Other clear fluids are chicken soup, Pedialyte, and other rehydrating drinks available at your grocery or drug store.

Tea should not be given because it, like any caffeine-containing product, causes you to lose water through urination and may contribute to dehydration.

Your child should urinate light-colored urine at least every four hours if well hydrated.

Although this is a very stressful time for a lot of people I hope that this will help you and if you have any ideas please let me know also.  I know that my daughter had a virus two years ago, my husband I were so concerned about her, we went to the emergency room.  She was so sick, and her fever was so high.  Has your child ever had a fever so high that it scared you?  Share your story!!  Good luck!

Lynn

Sauce On The Shirt

I’m not sure what the problem is but every time my husband eats something he gets the sauce on his shirt.                                     

I made spaghetti for supper and it doesn’t fail, my husband seems to always miss his mouth (which is odd in and of its self) every time and gets the food on his shirt.  It is entertaining and annoying at the same time.  I feel like I always have to clean up after him.

We could be going though the drive through and he will get ketchup on himself, or a hot dog, mustard, or I make steak and potatoes, he will get HP sauce on his shirt.  Strange right.  He has enough to say, how can he possibly miss his mouth.

 Really it is at the point that we don’t even eat out on public anymore, I’m pretty sure that they don’t serve bibs big enough.  Our daughter is cleaner then he is for goodness sakes.       

 Do you have any funny stories about your significant other?  And the well known attacking sauce!!  Because it never seems to be them.  :0)

 Lynn

A Bratz Doll Definately Isn’t A Barbie

I have a niece that on every special occasion she somehow or another always received a Bratz doll for a present from my in-laws.  I always said to my husband, if we have a daughter I really don’t want her to receive those kinds of dolls.

I absolutely don’t like what they represent.  I was brought up with Barbie’s.  Yes, they too are very physically endowed, but they are not as sexually appealing as a Bratz’s doll.

 

Now I know what you are thinking, well they are young and children don’t understand the perception of what they exemplify, but as parents, it is our responsibility to maintain guidance, and as far as I am concerned they suggest sexuality.  Why do we want to pre-condition our children, our young girls to be sexual beings.  We don’t allow our daughters to watch shows with prostitutes.  They don’t depict what we want for our children. Why do some parents not allow their young boys to play with toy guns?  Because they are impressionable.  And we don’t want them thinking that guns are toys.

Look how Bratz dolls are dressed, like bimbo’s, short skirts, halter tops, tall hooker boots, (not that tall boots represents hookers) and make-up that is sufficient for a doll army.

I know that when I was a young girl playing with my Barbie I would envision myself to be Barbie and dance with my Ken in the beautiful gowns that she had. 

Well how do we as parents not think that our young impressionable children aren’t thinking the same thing.  I know that my daughter said that she couldn’t wait to wear make-up like the Bratz doll.  That’s great, pre-conditioning.  It’s our responsibility to protect our children from the world.  They will be grown-ups in no time.  Why are we rushing this process, their minds are so susceptible.

So it came to that point that my daughter received a Bratz doll from the in-laws, two in fact.  They know that I don’t like what they represent and yet still with no respect got her the only thing that I don’t want my daughter to have.  So with that  I had to tell my daughter that the dolls were not dressed like ladies and that dolls are wonderful, but some dolls are for older girls.  At least that way they can understand right from wrong a bit more.

I know that some mothers out there are probably thinking that I have over analyzed this situation, but as my daughter’s mother I have to do what I think is the best for MY daughter.  And to me Bratz dolls are not positive stimulation.

Do you have a toy that you don’t like?  Or views on my feelings?

Lynn

Sneezing Exhibition

My hubby has a trick……he can chew a piece of excel gum and sneeze three times in a row.  It is hilarious.

He’s like a circus act,

Me, “ok, you go out and chew a piece of gum, without anyone knowing and say that you can randomly sneeze three times.” 

My husband, “that would be cool.”  That’s right, I am thinking of making a side act of some sort.  He’s like a dog that can bark on command, or shake a paw, everybody thinks that that is cool, well my husband can sneeze three times on demand.  That’s right my trick is better than your trick.

My daughter and I get a kick out of it every time.  Of course this little trick usually happens when we get in the car.  Once we get in and buckle up our daughter will ask for her piece of gum and then my husband.  We just sit there and wait.  Upon arrival of the gum hitting his palate, it begins.  Three sneezes!!  This could really take off in New York City.  He could make a fortune! lol

Beat that David Copperfield!!

Lynn

Bored…..So Bored

Do you ever get in the mode where you are so bored, sleep won’t even take the boredom away. 

So I’m sitting here thinking to myself, what will take my boredom away, well perhaps a bottle of wine, maybe dancing.

Once you become a mother the last thing that you want to do after a long day is get motivated.

I was looking on Facebook and it astounds me the amount of people who are bored tonight, could it be the weather perhaps.  Rain, so much rain.  Makes us sleepy, down in the dumps, and bored.

I wish there was something to do, tis the season, to be bored!!

My Car Won’t Start…..Story of My Life

 

For the last two years my husband and I have been having car troubles.  Our car won’t start, now this is a very random event. 

For a while I would wake up and get ready for work and when arriving at the car it wouldn’t start.  You’ll get a kick out of this, it thinks that it is being stolen.  That’s right the security light is on. 

So I would truck my pissed off butt into the house and call work letting them know that I may not be able to make it in to work, but that I would continue trying.  In turn hope that I would just be late.

My husband thought I was loosing my mind, he really thought that I just didn’t want to go to work.  So as the day went on, he would go downstairs and put the keys in the ignition and low and behold it would start.  To my dismay once a gain I felt like a fool.  He started it, just like that.

So I had become very negative about the car, then my husband and parents were like, “Lynn if you continue having a negative attitude about the vehicle then bad things will really happen.”  Well they are happening, that’s the thing, and it has only ever happened to me.

Just two weeks ago my husband was going for a job interview, and guess what……..the car didn’t start.  Whoooo, now it’s not just me.  It has finally effected him. 

So when someone asks me what is wrong with my car I just say that I have an Alero GM.  You would think that they would recall this car, because it happens to do this to everyone that has this make of vehicle with the year 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003. 

There is absolutely nothing that can be done about this problem,  our car didn’t start for a week, two weeks ago, so we had it towed to Moncton.  Well $120.00 later, the mechanic put the keys in the ignition and it started.  Our car went for a $120.00 joy ride.  For nothing!  It’s just a jinxed vehicle.

What can you do when you have junk.  Grin and bare it.

My husband put some quick fixes in the comment box, so if you have been experiencing some of the same difficulties then this might help you too.

Lynn